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Tag Archives: Life

The BIG Name Change Question

So my Mum and Dad came up with this strange topic:
They had noticed that an increasing number of newly-weds don’t either completely drop their maiden names or outrightly just don’t adopt the new husband’s name. And they were directly facing me with a question-what’s my view about it? Lemme say at this point that imma be getting married in a couple o’ months (or years), so anything I say or don’t say may be used against me on my wedding day!
As per Naija Boi that I am , I know this is a sensitive topic. So I’m standing on an egg without breaking it, if I can wriggle out of this safe.
But can a man really do anything much if you’ve married the love of your life and you eventually discovered she keeps her maiden name(maybe with your surname attached like a strange rat-tail) on her documents and even on her facebook profile.
My Mum thinks men are just being too docile,not willing to take responsibility and not putting their foot down enough.
My Dad thinks it’s also the fault of the men.
But one thing I like is that they both admitted, this issue wasn’t even a question to be asked in the days when they got married-the lady, as if on auto-pilot, changed her surname and she did it proudly.
I’m asking, will you really risk your wife’s happiness on a name-change issue and do you think men are to be blamed for a woman’s decision.
Remember, the long-standing family formular before you answer:
Happy Wife=Happy Life.

The Strange Rat-tail

The Strange Rat-tail

Check this blog for new posts by Tito Tobi on Wednesdays or Saturdays. His books are available on http://www.smashwords.com

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Posted by on 24/09/2014 in General

 

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Sea Canes: 1971

This is what my mind says when I remember my friends and loved ones you’ve taken.

Angel of Death

Half my friends are dead.
I will make new ones, said earth.
No, give me them back, as they were, instead,

 Copyright: Poem by  Derek Walcott, 1971.

 
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Posted by on 31/05/2014 in Poems

 

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My True Love and its Evils

This story reminds me of the first lady I remember having a crush on. Her name was Funke (pronounced as foo:n-kE) and we met at an examination venue. That meant little time to talk ‘the fairy tales’ but somehow the love fairy (Is that Oberon from Shakespeare’s or someone else?) seemed to sprinkle the love juices on her eyelids too. We got close and later it just somehow…..

Oh my! Read the story first, it’s not about me but my audience….you.

Strange as Love

 

Love is sometimes strange. It can build someone as well as destroy someone.
Just like many stories, it started the first time he saw her; just like in a fairy tale he was frozen, could not understand what was happening to him. It took him some days to realize actually he was in love with that girl and decided to propose to her. But via one of his friends he got to know that the girl was already with someone. Broken, he was unable to forget that girl…years passed but still that girl was on his mind…he already lost his heart with that girl…..but what destiny plans no one yet has been able to understand…. He got on facebook and one day, a conversation starts with a girl… They exchange a few words and in the conversation he got to tell her his story, how he lost his love before he could get a chance……but as fate would have it, he was actually narrating his story to the girl herself……the girl eventually tells him she’s never had any boyfriend…..excited, he promised that he will prove his love for her and everyday show her how much he loves her….but like in every love story; if there is no hardship, nothing is gained…… that girl had no mobile….the only way to get contact with her was the online chat….so the guy waits for her to come online everyday to talk with her…. Finally, she says yes to him….the guy says that he’ll always keep her happy ….but every time the girl breaks up with him yet they patch it up….

And like this it went on….

Once they were together and her birthday was near, the guy wished to invite all their friends, book a restaurant and surprise the girl. He bought a ring and decided to make her his…. It was the day he was waiting for….. ring in pocket…bought a cake and champagne and left it in the restaurant…..bought a bouquet…..everyone was present and was waiting for her to come….. From afar she finally came into sight and was coming towards him but while she came closer, he felt as if someone smashed his heart…..but with courage in his heart and determination to make her happy they converged at the restaurant where a table was already booked…. The girl just says we need to talk….the tears he was holding back just dropped …….and he could not say anything as the waitress was coming with the cake…. they sang happy birthday for her and she cut the cake………..all her friends along with their boyfriends were there and she announced to the entire group and says we need to break this up….my family is against it and with that she leaves him….all her friends tried to change her decision but she was determined to leave him………I know you wanted a happy ending but, hey….

It’s just how true love is compensated.

While the girl says true love does not exist…..he’s still trying to get over it and make his life with someone else but still he could not forget her as love like this happens only once…… the rest is just life.

A quote from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s last novel, Americanah, suffices “Man, we never marry the one we truly love; we all marry the one who is available when we’re ready”.

Back to me, her name wasn’t Funke.

What did you expect? We’re still friends on facebook and she’ll probably see this.

Heck, now, do you still believe that? Or anything anyone says after such an experience as this.

 
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Posted by on 23/02/2014 in Uncategorized

 

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